{"id":3738,"date":"2023-03-14T04:47:50","date_gmt":"2023-03-14T04:47:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.rutgers.edu\/writers-house-review\/?page_id=3738"},"modified":"2023-11-20T20:22:42","modified_gmt":"2023-11-20T20:22:42","slug":"two-poems-2","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/sites.rutgers.edu\/writers-house-review\/vol-4-winter-2023-2024\/two-poems-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Two Poems"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

Tori Greiner<\/em><\/h4>\n
\n

 <\/p>\n

the pain, of a bad brain<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

when I look into the garbage retainer<\/p>\n

I called a brain<\/p>\n

I have found nothing but grocery lists<\/p>\n

rotten apple cores stained<\/p>\n

with black ink<\/p>\n

and wild fire ants<\/p>\n

circling the light cutting through<\/p>\n

the shadow of the tree<\/p>\n

when I wake up in the middle of the night<\/p>\n

to sleeptalk a customer\u2019s total<\/p>\n

my boyfriend will think it\u2019s funny<\/p>\n

but I just know<\/p>\n

there is a piece of me gone<\/p>\n

that I will never be able<\/p>\n

to call back<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

(I have forgotten so much<\/p>\n

the fire ants remember so little<\/p>\n

but blinding light<\/p>\n

eating away at shadow)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

halfway to the shore<\/p>\n

looking for my purse<\/p>\n

I had forgotten that too<\/p>\n

(my brain running circles<\/p>\n

sunlight melting eyes<\/p>\n

I remember so little)<\/p>\n

throwing groceries down in anger<\/p>\n

Rachel reassures me we can stop home<\/p>\n

she will drive me back<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I am staring out the window<\/p>\n

trying not to project myself onto the road<\/p>\n

I am staring out the window<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

following a deceased deer<\/p>\n

laid in parkway graveside<\/p>\n

ran into headlights<\/p>\n

birthed and saved under needled branch<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

what else can she remember<\/p>\n

besides that final blinding light<\/p>\n

\n

 <\/p>\n

doing the wrong thing<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

way back in time there is a barbie box playset\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

it’s your room and there\u2019s us<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0stuck in old feelings after the first show\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

i had seen you play in that new band\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

standing too close in the basement next to the boiler\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

it was dangerous but i heard one time\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

that to be friends after heartbreak requires\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

you to keep loving and yeah,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

i just might\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

i laid in your bed while you peed before driving me home\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

with my head on your pillow i stared at the wall\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

seeing me as you walked back in\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

you silently sat next to me and patted me gently\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

and it felt like a soul embrace\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

(i’ll keep it in mine if you keep it in yours)\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

now sitting in my driveway\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

it was 50b Morrell Street and you\u2019d never see it again (that way)\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

avoiding eye contact in the used car your dad had bought you<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0that i had heard about but only seen once\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

the night we had ended things<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

it was going to be purgatory forever,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

just didn\u2019t want each other enough,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

and i had asked if you knew what i meant
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

and you looked at me and spoke\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

“yeah, i feel it right now.”<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n

Tori Greiner<\/strong> is an English major with a creative writing minor here at Rutgers. She is a senior and will be graduating in January of 2023. She writes, “I am so grateful for all that I have learned at Rutgers through the wonderful English program–and I can’t wait until graduation!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tori Greiner   the pain, of a bad brain   when I look into the garbage retainer I called a brain I have found nothing but grocery lists rotten apple … Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2513,"featured_media":0,"parent":3525,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-3738","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nTwo Poems - Writers House Review<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/sites.rutgers.edu\/writers-house-review\/vol-4-winter-2023-2024\/two-poems-2\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Two Poems - Writers House Review\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Tori Greiner   the pain, of a bad brain   when I look into the garbage retainer I called a brain I have found nothing but grocery lists rotten apple … Read More\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/sites.rutgers.edu\/writers-house-review\/vol-4-winter-2023-2024\/two-poems-2\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Writers House Review\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-11-20T20:22:42+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sites.rutgers.edu\/writers-house-review\/vol-4-winter-2023-2024\/two-poems-2\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/sites.rutgers.edu\/writers-house-review\/vol-4-winter-2023-2024\/two-poems-2\/\",\"name\":\"Two Poems - 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