A Preliminary Report on an Intervention Designed to Reduce Grandmother Death Resulting From College Exams

Lee Jussim

April, 2002

Background

Adams (1990) was the first to document the crisis in grandmother deaths resulting from college exams.  He discovered that the rate of grandmother mortality rose 10-20 times just prior to the period of exams, when compared to the ambient mortality rate at other times. Adams (1990) speculated that the most likely cause of death was inordinate grandmotherly stress at the thought of her grandchild taking a difficult exam. This interpretation was further strengthened by findings that the worse students had been performing in the class, the greater the likelihood of at least one grandmother dying prior to an exam.  Grandmothers probably experience particularly acute stress at the thought of their grandchildren taking a test in which they are unlikely to do well. He also proposed three possible solutions:

1. Stop giving exams.  Adams concluded that this would prevent colleges from evaluating the competence of people interested in becoming doctors, lawyers, engineers, MBAs, teachers, etc.  Therefore, colleges would no longer be able to train these and many other professionals.  As a result, the economy would come to a grinding halt.  This did not seem to be a good idea.

2. Only admit orphans to college.  This would be a good idea except for the paucity of orphans.

3. Have students never inform their families that they are in college. This would work if feasible.  Students could tell their families they are going off to work (if they live at home), or join the armed forces or a religious cult (if they live on campus).  The lack of income, however, might eventually become noticeable in the first case. Joining the armed forces or a religious cult would seem to have more potential to work as an enduring deception.  However, both options would likely stress grandmothers at least as much as college exams, so that it is not clear that either would lead to much net reduction in premature grandmother mortality.

Click here to see Adams (1990) original research report.

Because all three of these interventions seem unsatisfactory, our crack research team designed something altogether different and workable, and which has none of the flaws of Adams’ three proposals.

The Intervention

Over the last several years, we have instituted the following intervention, designed to reduce the frequency of premature grandmother mortality. Students are informed that, should they miss a major multiple choice exam, they will have an opportunity to take the brutal essay makeup. The means on this test typically range from F-D, whereas the means on multiple choice test range from about C+ to B.

Results

Grandmother mortality rates with no intervention. The ambient rate of grandmother death at any time during a semester, other than the week before a major exam, is about 1/2000 students. The rate of grandmother death during the week leading up to a major exam skyrockets to about 1/200.  (This means that, summing over the three weeks leading up to the three major tests in my classes, approximately 1 of every 200 grandmothers dies).

Results from preliminary trials.   Preliminary trials simply required students who missed the main exam to take an essay makeup.  There was no warning about its brutality — indeed, when we first instituted this intervention, we anticipated that the grades on the essay would be slightly, but not dramatically, lower than those of the main exam. Although this preliminary intervention did not reduce grandmother mortality at all, it did reveal that most students who took the essay makeup performed extremely poorly.  Although speculations on the source of such difficulties are beyond the scope of this paper, these preliminary trials did inspire:

1) the fearful name of “brutal essay makeup” and

2) the main intervention, which simply involved telling students that if they miss the main exam, regardless of the reason, they will have the opportunity to take the brutal essay makeup.

Main intervention results.  The main intervention — simply informing students that, if they miss the main exam they couldtake the brutal essay makeup — dramatically reduced the grandmother mortality rate.  Even during the week prior to an exam, grandmother mortality was a mere 1/1000, which although still higher than the ambient 1/2000 rate of grandmotherly death without an exam, is much lower than the 1/200 rate typically found for most college classes around exam time. In laymen’s terms, we have saved the lives of 4 out of every 5 grandmothers who would typically die during the week leading up to a major exam.

Discussion

It is clear that we have developed a highly, though not completely, successful intervention for reducing grandmothers’ risk of death around student test-taking. Just why this intervention works, however, is not clear.  One possibility is that the thought of the brutal essay make up is so horrible that the main test, by contrast, seems less threatening, thereby reducing grandmotherly stress. Another possibility stems from students’ increased motivation to stay healthy and attend class the day of the test (rather than take the brutal essay makeup).  Perhaps they begin working out at every opportunity, including with their grandmothers. Because of their increased physical fitness, the grandmothers become less susceptible to the stressful effects of their grandchildren’s exams. One thing is clear, though — we know what does not work. Simply having the brutal essay makeup is not enough — indeed, this intervention was completely ineffective at reducing grandmotherly death.  It was only when students were informed well in advance about the the brutal essay makeup that the dramatic reduction in grandmother mortality was obtained.  Thus it is extremely important to the success of the intervention that students be informed about the difficulty of the brutal essay makeup well before the first multiple choice exam. The full and complete reasons why this intervention has been so successful may never be known. Regardless, it has been extremely gratifying to provide such a large contribution to the public health of grandmothers with such a simple intervention.